Niemowlęce powinności

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Powinno, nie powinno. Te dwa określenia słyszę ostatnio wyjątkowo często. Na przykład w 11 tygodniu dziecko powinno to, a w 13 tamto. W tym momencie twój syn powinien obrócić się na bok, a córka chwytać grzechotkę. W tym miesiącu maluch powinien przybrać na wadze tyle i tyle. Tak, zdecydowanie żyję w świecie powinności i tak się zastanawiam, czy powinnam się tym przejmować?

Kiedyś na spacerze z przyjaciółką, jej mama zwróciła nam uwagę na jedno – współczesne matki mają za dużo wiedzy, za dużo informacji i za bardzo się tymi informacjami przejmują. Za dużo czytamy, za dużo aplikacji instalujemy. Jeżeli nie potrafisz tych wiadomości przecedzić przez filtr racjonalności, to ci wyjdzie, że twoje dziecko jest opóźnione, bo nie przewraca się jeszcze na bok, a przecież powinno, no i nie umie jeszcze wydać z siebie „aghuu”, a według poradnika to czas najwyższy, po 8 tygodni skończyło w poniedziałek, a dzisiaj już jest przecież środa. Ja, od kiedy mam Dawida, upewniłam się w jednym – dziecka nie przyspieszysz. Bo niby po co?

Kiedy Dawid był noworodkiem, patrzyłam na niego z niedowierzaniem. Bo nie wiedziałam, że bycie mamą to aż taki cud. Pomyślałam wtedy o tych rodzicach, którzy wyścigują się na rozwój swoich dzieci. Przypatrzyłam się jeszcze raz swojemu, oglądnęłam go z każdej strony, poobserwowałam jego zachowanie i wiecie, co mi wyszło? Był zupełnie zwyczajny. Jego wybitność polegała jedynie na tym, że jest moim dzieckiem, co oznacza nic innego jak to, że dla mnie jest wyjątkowy.  I tak powinno być. A doszukiwanie się w noworodku ponadprzeciętnych zachowań jest śmieszne. Bo tak małe dzieci są piękne właśnie w swojej normalności i w tym, że z nikim się nie wyścigują, rozwijają się w swoim tempie.

Nie ma takiego sposobu, który przekonałby niemowlaka, że może powinien wziąć się do roboty i poćwiczyć na przykład chwytanie. To samo dotyczy, jakby to określić, rozrostu. Dawid jest z gatunku tych dzieci szybko rosnących. Ma trzy miesiące, właśnie podwoił swoją wagę urodzeniową. Młody nie je wybitnie często, ma długie przerwy, nie daję mu golonki i schabowego na obiad, po prostu szybko rośnie. Jest większy od rówieśników, ale proporcje ma zupełnie w porządku. Pediatra stwierdził, że jest po prostu dobrze zbudowany. Ale wykracza ponad średnią, co u innej pani doktor, podczas wizyty przed szczepieniem, poskutkowało pokiwaniem głową, takim z dezaprobatą straszną. No ludzie, jedno dziecię będzie długie i chude, drugie jak mopsik, z fałdkami do całowania.  No i mój ma właśnie takie fałdki, w ilości sporej. Niedługo niemowlaki będzie się przepuszczać przez miarę, jak pomidory, sprawdzając, czy spełniają unijne standardy.

Na co jeszcze odważył się mój pierworodny? W 10 tygodniu jechaliśmy przestraszeni do lekarza. Dziecko od pewnego czasu zaczęło się dławić, zakrztuszać. Nagle, tak z niczego, mały nie mógł złapać powietrza. Po odwróceniu go na brzuch głową do dołu wypluwał ślinę.  Coś strasznego, widok przerażający. Bałam się, że to refluks, albo jakaś flegma wstrętna. Lekarz oglądnął go z każdej strony, osłuchał, opukał, zaglądnął w paszczę i wydał wyrok – ZĘBY. Dawid zaczął ząbkować trochę wcześniej, przy czym wydziela dużo śliny, a że jest jeszcze malutki, to ma kłopoty z jej ogarnięciem.  Dziecko faktycznie się śliniło, zachowanie syna w ostatnim czasie faktycznie jakieś inne, ale na zęby bym nie wpadła. Bo przecież zęby powinny wychodzić około 6 miesiąca. Przy wizycie przed szczepieniem, ta sama pani doktor, której nie spodobała się dawidowa waga, stwierdziła, że to na pewno nie zęby, bo dziecko ma 12 tygodni i jest to fizjologicznie nie możliwe. Nie powinien ząbkować, bo po co mu teraz te zęby? Ale jakoś nie słucha, uparł się i cierpi, na złość standardom. Masz ci los.

Daję rozwijać się swojemu noworodkowi nie patrząc na powinności. Ten beztroski uśmiech każdego ranka i ogólne samozadowolenie, kiedy bezwiednie macha nóżkami i rączkami świadczą o tym, że jest szczęśliwy i zdrowy. I o to chodzi. Mamy uzgodnione z przyjaciółkami, że jeżeli nasze dzieci będą miały rok i nie będą chciały siedzieć, to będziemy się martwić. Obserwuję moje dziecko, cieszę się każdym nowym updatem, ale nie rwę włosów z głowy, jeżeli w danym tygodniu nie nabył jakiejś umiejętności. Bo on ma to głęboko w swojej słodkiej dupce, że tydzień minął a on nie robi czegoś, co zasygnalizowała aplikacja. Dzięki temu, że Dawid pojawił się w naszym życiu, nauczyłam się doceniać drobnostki. Potrafię usiąść i patrzeć na niego, radosnego, mimo że w kuchni czeka coś do zrobienia. Wieczorem, mimo zmęczenia, potrafię stać na jego łóżeczkiem i patrzeć jak śpi, chociaż od paru dni obiecuję sobie, że w końcu zrobię porządek w papierach. Bo dziecko, takie niewinne i nieświadome pokazuje mi, że nie ma się gdzie spieszyć, że przez ten pośpiech i ciągłe dążenie do celów narzucanych nam przez współczesny świat, ucieka nam tyle niesamowitych momentów. Bo skupieni na gonitwie, skupieni na powinnościach, gubimy gdzieś ten spokój, które każde dziecko posiada.

Obiecałam sobie, dla mojego dziecka, że nie będę zaspokajać sobie nim swoich rodzicielskich ambicji. To daje szczęście mi, D. i młodemu. Olać powinności, cieszmy się tym, co mamy. Każde dziecko jest inne i jeżeli któryś rodzic ma z tym problem i tego nie rozumie, powinien przyglądnąć się swojemu i się w niego wsłuchać. Takie niemowlaki, mimo, że są na tym świecie o wiele krócej niż my, są pod tym względem o wiele mądrzejsze, niż niejeden dorosły. Dawidowa rączka pozdrawia Was ze zdjęcia 🙂

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