Co może spotkać cię w ciąży – wpis długi i dosłowny

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Ostatnio sporo słyszę i czytam o kobietach, które są zdziwione tym, jak przechodzą ciążę. W różnych dyskusjach i rozmowach w sieci, wymieniają się one doświadczeniami i mówią, że nie były przygotowane na to, jakie samopoczucie może je zastać w stanie błogosławionym. Twierdzą, że nikt nie przygotował ich do tego, co może się z nimi dziać, no i przede wszystkim, że nikt nie uprzedził ich, że ich ciało faktycznie na jakiś czas przestaje być ich ciałem i w pewnym momencie doznają wielkiego szoku. Nagle dopada je największy jak dotąd w życiu dół i często zaczynają żałować tego, że podjęły decyzję o posiadaniu dziecka. Podobno to mija, jak już w bólach i mękach wyskoczy z nich najsłodsze na świecie maleństwo, ale wtedy pojawia się zjazd hormonalny, przemęczenie i istna masakra w głowie, która podczas kolejnej nieprzespanej nocy, często skutkuje rozważaniami, czy wyskoczyć przez okno w pojedynkę, czy razem z dzieckiem.

Cóż, o fazie poporodowej dowiem się i napiszę dopiero, gdy sama jej doświadczę, więc tak gdzieś plus minus za miesiąc. Teraz opiszę, co może przytrafić się w ciąży, z tych mniej przyjemnych spraw. Może akurat trafi tu jakaś kobieta, która chciałaby wiedzieć, czego się spodziewać, a nie wie. Może akurat przeczyta i przygotuje się lepiej na to, jak mały, rozwijający się w niej człowiek, może przewrócić do góry nogami w jej organizmie wszystko co się da, i wcale nie będzie pytał o zgodę, mimo że podobno dzieci powinny słuchać swoich rodziców. Pisałam już tutaj, jakie mam podejście to tzw. maruderstwa. Nadal zdania nie zmieniam. Tutaj nie o tym.

Tu napiszę, jakie w ciąży mogą być powody do tego marudzenia. Nie jestem książkowo znoszącą ciążę nimfą, nie latam na chmurce i przez większość dni nie widzę tego promienienia, które podobno widzą we mnie inni. Czasem jest tak do kitu, że zamykam oczy, biorę dziesięć głębokich wdechów i na siłę pozbywam się wszystkich myśli, które zmierzają w kierunku: „Po co mi to było?” Bo gdyby przez chwilę zastanowić się nad tym pytaniem, to chyba większość z nas wie po co. I jeżeli świadomie zdecydowałam się na dziecko i tego chciałam, to teraz przez chwilę muszę poznosić tego skutki. Przez chwilę, bo tak naprawdę te dziewięć miesięcy mija tak szybko, że mam wrażenie, że dopiero zaczęłam się źle czuć, a tu już wszyscy, łącznie z kopiącym w żebra potomkiem, usilnie przypominają mi, że to już prawie koniec. Zaczynam więc, proszę bardzo, mój opis dolegliwości. Dosłowny. Bez upiększania. Jeżeli jesteś więc wrażliwa/y na słuchanie o wszelkiego rodzaju dolegliwościach cielesnych, gastrycznych i tym podobnych, radzę przestać czytać.

Ja po pierwszej, bezobjawowej ciąży, straconej w 12 tygodniu, chciałam mieć dolegliwości. Chciałam, to dostałam. Właściwie od początku, zgodnie z podręcznikowymi opisami, dopadały mnie wszystkie przykre ciążowe sprawy, jakie mogły. Z przerwami, które doprowadzały mnie do szału, bo zanik dolegliwości traktowałam jako zły znak. Z miesiąca na miesiąc nowych dolegliwości jednak przybywało, a starych wcale nie ubywało. Cudowny przypływ mocy w drugim trymestrze zapomniał wysiąść na moim przystanku i pojechał dalej, do kogoś innego. Jedyne, co mi się dostało z tych przyjemnych spraw, oprócz oczywiście mojego synka, są włosy, które w końcu posiadam w ilości umożliwiającej zrobienie sobie jakiejkolwiek fryzury. Fajnie, szkoda tylko, że nie tylko włosy na głowie zwiększyły szybkość przyrostu i objętość. Na tym etapie cała już czuję się owłosiona jak małpka, a nie muszę chyba pisać, że gdy brzuch osiąga pewną wielkość, codzienna depilacja to ostatnie, na co masz ochotę. Pod prysznicem opieram głowę o ścianę i prawie zasypiam, od samego początku ciąży. Śpiącośćroztargnienie towarzyszą mi przez większość czasu, na zmianę, bądź w komplecie, zależy od dnia. Woda spływa po coraz większym ciele, a ja nie mam ochoty stamtąd wychodzić, bo przecież wyjście wiąże się z wycieraniem i ubieraniem, no i ze smarowaniem kremem na rozstępy, a ja łapię zadyszkę nawet przy myśleniu, a co dopiero przy takich czynnościach. Później trzeba się doczłapać do łóżka, coraz częściej w rozkroku, na pingwina, bo na etapie 33 tygodnia ciąży krocze zaczęło boleć tak, jakbym przejechała pustynię na wściekłym rumaku. Krocze to nie wszystko. Od początku ciąży co jakiś czas pachwiny ciągnięciem przypominają, że są. No i ukochany kręgosłup, albo mięśnie wokół kręgosłupa, albo cokolwiek to jest, nie ważne, bo boli jak cholera, kiedy tylko chcę wstać, iść, położyć się wygodnie, lub dłużej gdzieś posiedzieć. Wieczorami, gdy mam bardziej aktywny dzień, kręgosłup nie boli, on nakurwia. Sorry, ale nie da się tego inaczej ująć. Chodzę wtedy po domu jak paralityk. Prawa noga jeszcze jakoś idzie do przodu sama, ale lewą trzeba powłóczyć, bo jak chcę iść szybciej, to jest ból.

Są jeszcze biodra. No tak, biodra odgrywają bardzo ważną rolę w życiu kobiety, nie mogą więc pozwolić o sobie zapomnieć w tak ważnym momencie jej życia, jak ciąża. Kładę się do łóżka, zaraz po tym, jak już się do niego doczłapię. Jestem, zajęłam pozycję do siadu, siadam, układam poduszki, po drodze 24 jęknięcia i 17 westchnień, jestem, leżę. Chcę zasnąć spokojnie, ale nie, jak to tak spokojnie? Biodra się budzą i zaczyna się. Ból, tępy ból, który nie da ci zasnąć, póki nie wsadzisz sobie między nogi największej poduszki, będącej w twoim posiadaniu. Pomagają też plastry zakładane przez siostrę fizjoterapeutkę, więc jak ktoś ma okazję i możliwość, niech się obkleja, polecam. W takiej rozkraczonej pozycji ból bioder trochę przechodzi, nie mija jednak zespół niespokojnych nóg, który oczywiście również postanowił mnie odwiedzić, tak do kompletu, żeby biodrom nie było głupio, że tylko one są wredne. Zaczynam więc ruszać tymi stopami tak, żeby nie przeszkadzać leżącemu obok mężczyźnie, który stara się zrozumieć, co mi się dzieje, ale nie jest w stanie, bo przecież sam tego nie doświadcza i każde jego pytanie „Dobrze się czujesz?”, zadane po godzinie 22:00, czyli po godzinie, kiedy mam już tak dość, że chcę kogoś zabić, kończy się przypływem fali irytacji, bo nie dość, że źle się czuję, to jeszcze hormony robią ze mnie jędzę.

No właśnie, te wahania nastrojów. To jest prawdziwa jazda. Tutaj o tym pisałam, jest ciekawie. Myślę, że i bez burzy wszystkich możliwych -onów, -enów, -yn i -in byłoby wystarczająco ciężko, ale nie, natura daje ci jeszcze jazdę w postaci substancji, które muszą być, by dziecko dobrze się rozwijało, ale dzięki nim ty czasem stajesz się osobą, której normalnie sama nawet byś nie lubiła. No cóż…

A to co się dzieje w ciąży z układem pokarmowym? No cała gama możliwości, od samego jego początku, który ma miejsce w jamie ustnej, do samego końca, który ma miejsce wiadomo gdzie. Tak więc dziąsła puchną i krwawią. Są wrażliwe na wszystko, czasem nawet na powietrze wdychane przy mówieniu. Mycie zębów staje się przykrą koniecznością, bo nie dość, że dziąsła krwawią, to włożenie szczoteczki do ust często powoduje odruch wymiotny. Odruch wymiotny towarzyszy w ciąży wielu z nas i wcale nie jest powiedziane, że tylko na początku. Fakt, że mdłości największe są właśnie w pierwszym trymestrze, u mnie jednak zdarzają się do tej pory. W drugim trymestrze też były. Już się przyzwyczaiłam. Mdłości jak zjesz i jak nie zjesz. I wcale nie są tylko poranne. One po prostu są, kiedy im się podoba. Czasem dochodzą do nich również wymioty. Ja wymiotowałam w ciąży chyba tylko cztery razy, ale sama nie wiem, czy nie lepiej by było czasem zwymiotować i mieć to z głowy, niż męczyć się z tymi mdłościami. Idziemy dalej, zgaga. Moja przyjaciółka, niezawodna. Mnie męczy od samego początku, pojawiła się zanim jeszcze się dowiedziałam o ciąży. Później na chwilę zniknęła, by w połowie ciąży powrócić ze zdwojoną siłą. Mniej więcej do 30 tygodnia pojawiała się tylko po większym posiłku, wieczorem, na leżąco, no i dało się nad nią jeszcze jakoś zapanować. Od pięciu tygodni jednak już nawet z nią nie walczę, nic nie pomaga. Mogłabym wypić cysternę kakao i zagryźć to ciężarówką migdałów. „Przecież możesz brać Reni” – ktoś powie. Tylko po co, skoro nie działa? Piecze, pali tak bardzo, że czasami aż boli i mam wrażenie, że nie przełknę nic, bo zejdę. Czasem czuję, jakby na poziomie mostka utknął mi wielki, twardy kawałek jabłka…tak, to chyba takie uczucie, sama nie wiem, w każdym razie mało przyjemne, bo bolesne. Przełykając ciepłą herbatę mam wrażenie, że czas na chwilę zwalnia i ta jej ciepłość zatrzymuje się w okolicach tego samego mostka, w którym tkwi jabłko, powodując palące boleści. No ale piję coś, bo chcę to uczucie jakoś ugasić, zresztą w ciąży trzeba pić dużo, więc wyjścia i tak nie ma. Zimna woda pomaga na parę sekund, jednak po chwili znowu wszystko wraca. Do zgagi dochodzi refluks, mój kochany. Kilka razy zdarzył mi się, jak już przysypiałam. Cowieczorna porcja rzygowin w moich ustach, uroczo. No i odbijanie. Po prostu musisz beknąć, bo nie wytrzymasz. Czasem  sama jestem pod wrażeniem odgłosów, jakie potrafię z siebie wydać. Dobrze, że siedzę sama w domu w ciągu dnia, to nie ma krępacji. Gdy jednak spotykam się ze znajomymi, a takie soczyste beknięcie pojawi się w momencie, kiedy próbujesz z gracją wypowiedzieć się na jakiś temat…wtedy jest krępacja.

Nie tylko tą stroną może się oczywiście „odbijać”. Wzdęcia robiące z ciebie jeszcze większy balon, niż faktycznie jesteś. Tak, jakby ktoś włożył ci w jelita wielkie worki z powietrzem i stale uzupełniał, marzenie. No i zaparcia. Niby pijesz dużo, bo musisz i wtedy ma nie być zaparć, no ale też bierzesz żelazo, no i ogólnie chyba ciąża w tym nie pomaga. Więc tęsknisz za czasami, kiedy pójście do toalety nie było wyzwaniem. Co jeszcze wiąże się z tą uroczą dolegliwością? Hemoroidy moi drodzy, a jakże by inaczej. Nie dość, że i tak czujesz się beznadziejnie, bo całe ciało tak jakby nawala, to jeszcze czeka cię walka z tym cholerstwem. Tak, dajcie mi więcej, bo mi mało.

No właśnie, słowo  „mało” na pewno nie pasuje do ciąży, jeżeli chodzi o kwestię używania wkładek higienicznych, rozmiar XXL. Brak okresu przez dziewięć miesięcy jest znakomicie nadrabiany białą mazią, która leci z ciebie w takich ilościach, że zaczynasz rozważać używanie podpaski. A miało być tak wygodnie, bezokresowo…

Opuchlizna, kiedy to rano wstajesz i czujesz się większa o 3 rozmiary. Masz wrażenie, że twój organizm zabiera z otoczenia całe obecne H2O. Brak koncentracji, kłopoty z myśleniem, bezsenność, mimo że jesteś, śpiąca, lęki (często bezpodstawne, spowodowane przez hormony), niezdarność, ociężałość, obniżona odporność, nabrzmiałe piersi, które im stają się większe, tym dziwniej wyglądają, swędzenie i napinanie skóry na brzuchu, plecach, udach,  bóle w różnych częściach ciała, których nie da się wytłumaczyć i lekarz mówi, że to przejdzie. Mnie i tak omijają atrakcje związane z coparogodzinnym wstawaniem na siku w nocy. Mam stalowy pęcherz, od początku ciąży nie wstałam ani razu. Nie mam też opuchniętych stóp i dłoni, kłopotów skórnych, kamicy nerkowej, tak częstej w tym stanie i wielu innych, które przeżywają biedne, przyszłe mamy. Ale właśnie o to w tym chodzi. Przeżywają. Bo to wszystko jest do przeżycia. Czasem ciężkie, ale do przeżycia.

Ruchy dziecka. Coś najwspanialszego na świecie jak do tej pory. Naprawdę. Uwielbiam to. Na tym etapie ciąży sprawdzam ruchy jak tylko się obudzę. Młody jest na tyle duży, że czuję właściwie chyba każde jego posunięcie. Kładę więc dłoń na brzuchu, a on daje znać, że jest, zazwyczaj po upływie mniej niż minuty. Jest to przyjemne. Wstaję wtedy z łóżka i rozpoczynam dzień. Młody powoli rozbudza się, coraz wyraźniej się przewraca i rozciąga. Jest spokojny, czeka, zbiera siły. Jemy śniadanie, chwila ciszy i…jest, przypływ mocy. Kop, pod żebro, jest, trafiony, matka aż jęczy. Chwila spokoju i jeb, brawo, tym razem pod cycka, czymś twardym, dużym…nie wiem, nie chcę wiedzieć. Leżę później, ciach, dziecko układa się po swojemu, uciska na coś w okolicach żołądka, trochę duszące uczucie. Za chwilę uspokaja się, układa w innym miejscu i smyra, przyjemnie…to chyba stopa, małe i twarde…przyjemne.

I właśnie to jest moment, kiedy zapominam o wszystkim, na co mogę narzekać.  Zapominam o czuciu się do dupy, bólu i zgadze i o tym, że są dni, że nie mogę patrzeć na siebie w lustrze. Kiedy idę po schodach, robiąc sobie przerwę co trzy stopnie, między jednym ciężkim nabraniem powietrza a drugim, łapię się za brzuch i już wiem, dlaczego mimo, że czasem jest ciężko, kobiety to znoszą. I często jest tak, że chociaż ciążę przechodzą bardzo źle, decydują się na drugie dziecko. Kiedy mój syn leniwie przeciąga się w moim brzuchu, powodując jego parominutowe falowanie, mam w nosie to, że przed zaśnięciem zgaga wypali mi przełyk. Mam gdzieś to, że zanim wieczorem uda mi się zdjąć skarpetki, będę musiała przez pięć minut szukać do tego dogodnej pozycji, by tę czynność wykonać. A nawet przy wygodnej pozycji i tak złapię taką zadyszkę, jakbym przebiegła półmaraton. Nie obchodzi mnie, że nie mogę zebrać myśli i są dni, że najprostsze rzeczy sprawiają mi trudność. Zaburzony ośrodek ciężkości nie pomaga w czuciu się jak zwinna baletnica, ale przecież on jest zaburzony przez coś tak ważnego, że to wszystko przestaje mieć znaczenie.

Oczywiście wszystkie te dolegliwości są sprawą indywidualną. Znam dziewczyny, które całą ciążę czują się rewelacyjnie, są aktywne, ćwiczą, codziennie cieszą się swoim stanem i okres ten jest dla nich najcudowniejszy w życiu, psychicznie i fizycznie. Znam też kobiety, które w pierwszej ciąży tak śmigały, a już w drugiej poznały tę drugą stronę, ciemniejszą. To wszystko, o czym napisałam, może się zdarzyć w ciąży. Może, ale nie musi. Tych dolegliwości jest o wiele więcej, są komplikacje, krwawienia, skurcze, konieczność leżenia przez cały czas, tony leków i wiele innych, o których na szczęście nie mam pojęcia. Ja mam to szczęście, że swoje niedogodności mogę przeżywać w domu, nie w szpitalu. To wszystko może zdarzyć się każdej z nas, bo organizm różnie reaguje na ciążę. Oglądałyście „Jak urodzić i nie zwariować?” Tam jest idealnie pokazane, jak to wszystko może wyglądać, polecam. To, co opisałam, nie musi się dziać codziennie. Czasem są naprawdę lekkie dni, takie, że aż dziwnie się czuję, że tak lekko. Jednak jak już przyjdzie taki gorszy dzień, taki naprawdę zły, to zawsze pamiętam o tym, dla kogo to wszystko znoszę i o tym, że to nie permanentne, to minie.

Szykujesz się więc do ciąży i nie wiesz, czego się spodziewać? Dziecka się spodziewaj, bo to o nie w ciąży chodzi. A cała reszta, nawet jak cię dopadnie, jest do zniesienia. Najlepsze nastawienie to chyba mieć nadzieję na jak najlepsze samopoczucie, ale być przygotowanym na najgorsze. Wtedy się nie zawiedziesz, nie poczujesz oszukana, że nie jesteś jedną z kobiet, które latają sobie na tych swoich ciążowych skrzydełkach i doprowadzają do szału inne, które też by tak chciały, a nie mogą. Bo natura jest mądrzejsza i często podczas ciąży nas spowalnia. Dzieje się to po coś. Ciało złym samopoczuciem daje znać, że masz leżeć, odpoczywać, to wszystko z jakiegoś powodu. Idę więc teraz pod prysznic, spędzić kolejne minuty z głową opartą o kafelki, w oczekiwaniu na wieczorną zgagę i tępy ból bioder. Jednak kiedy rano, kładąc dłoń na brzuchu poczuję ruchy mojego synka, będę wiedziała, że warto i że nie zamieniłabym tego na najlepsze samopoczucie świata.

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Nous présenterons ainsi successivement les conditions liées au soignant (I), les exigences relatives à l’environnement où est réalisée la « roqya » (II). Nous aborderons ensuite la question de la gratuité de la prestation ou de sa contrepartie financière et enfin les conditions dans laquelle elle est réalisée (III). I- Les conditions liées au soignant Souvent la « roqya » est perçue comme une pratique dispensée par un tiers. Or, il est essentiel de rappeler et de souligner un fait important : la meilleure des « roqya » est celle que nous dispensons nous-mêmes à travers le « dhikr » et la récitation du Coran. Ainsi, pour se prémunir des maux liés au mauvais œil ou à la sorcellerie, il convient régulièrement de lire le Coran et faire des invocations notamment celles du matin et du coucher, de réciter régulièrement la sourate « La vache », de renouveler son intention, de placer la certitude dans son cœur, d’effectuer ses prières etc., et surtout de demander à Allah la meilleure des protections. Toutefois, dans certaines conditions, il est nécessaire de recourir à un soignant. C’est à ce stade qu’il convient d’être vigilant. Il ne suffit pas de se rendre auprès d’une personne qui se présente avec la qualité de cheikh ou d’imam pour accepter de lui confier cette pratique. Comme pour tout procédé et encore plus lorsque cela relève de considérations religieuses, il est important de bien choisir son soignant car ce dernier est tenu de posséder des qualités bien affirmées. La maîtrise du Coran et des traditions prophétiques en la matière est une condition sine qua none, mais insuffisante. La personne doit également avoir des notions de psychologie afin de déterminer la part de sorcellerie et celle de troubles psychologiques fréquents chez les patients. La personne doit posséder une bonne hygiène de vie, notamment spirituelle puisqu’il n’est pas inutile de rappeler que le succès de la « roqya » dépend de Dieu. Ces critères sont difficilement évaluables, surtout par une personne qui est affectée par un mal-être, quelle que soit sa source. C’est pourquoi les proches doivent accompagner la personne dans la recherche d’un soignant qualifié et reconnu comme tel par des référents religieux de la localité (imam, responsables associatifs, etc.). De manière générale, le soignant doit posséder des qualités déterminées que nous pouvons synthétiser de la manière suivante. Il doit : être en capacité de lire le Coran, croire avec certitude au Coran, être empreint de piété, connaître les pièges et les caractéristiques du diable et des djinns, connaître la méthode prophétique de la « roqya », disposer de connaissances de base en psychologie, avoir la conviction que le succès de sa thérapie dépend de Dieu. A l’exception de la première exigence, il semble difficile de vérifier les autres conditions dans le cadre d’un entretien téléphonique avec une personne que nous n’avons jamais rencontrée, même si elle se présente sous le titre de « cheikh » ou d’un imam. Par conséquent, ces conditions soulignent une première limite quant au recours à la « roqya » par téléphone. Par ailleurs, à l’instar de tout médecin, le soignant doit, avant de prodiguer des conseils ou une médication, procéder à une consultation. Ainsi, un environnement adéquat est indispensable pour la réalisation d’une « roqya ». Il est enfin inconcevable qu’un médecin puisse vous affirmer par téléphone connaître votre maladie et attester pouvoir vous guérir. Vous auriez plus que des doutes sur ce prétendu médecin. II- Un environnement propice et la réalisation d’une consultation préalable à la réalisation d’une « roqya » Il est intéressant de noter que, dans son ouvrage « Comment se protéger des djinns & satan », Wahîd ‘Abdussalâm Bâli évoque l’importance du climat pour réaliser une roqya[2]. Ainsi, il expose les points suivants : « 1. Préparer le climat adéquat en faisant par exemple sortir les images et les statues de la pièce où on va soigner le malade, pour permettre aux anges d’y entrer. 2. Débarrasser le sujet de tout ce qu’il peut porter sur lui comme talismans ou amulettes et les brûler. 3. Éteindre tout ce qui peut émettre le son de la musique et des chants. 4. Vider le lieu de tout ce qui comporte une infraction à la shari‘a à savoir, par exemple, la présence d’un homme qui porte de l’or ou une femme qui ne porte pas le voile légal – al-hijab. 5. Donner au malade et à sa famille une leçon de dogme de façon à ce que leurs cœurs ne soient pas attachés à un autre qu’Allah. 6. Leur faire savoir que la façon de soigner est différente de celle des sorciers et des charlatans et que le Coran recèle guérison et miséricorde, comme l’a informé Allah le Puissant et le Majestueux. 7. Diagnostiquer son cas : pour cela poser des questions au malade pour s’assurer de la présence de tous les symptômes (…) ». Or, dans les témoignages communiqués, l’interlocuteur qui se présente comme soignant ne pose aucune question aux personnes. Il débute ainsi la « roqya » directement par une récitation du Coran. En outre, il est intéressant de souligner que dans l’un des témoignages communiqués à l’UFCM, l’interlocuteur demandait à la personne de remplir successivement des verres de lait, d’huile, d’eau etc. et de les poser par la suite sur la table de la salle à manger. Au point que la personne s’est retrouvée avec une multitude de verres posés sur la table. Le comble est que la personne ignorait ce qu’elle devait en faire lorsqu’elle a pris conscience de la tromperie. Nous constatons par conséquent qu’une « roqya » ne peut être réalisée dans un environnement quelconque. En effet, une procédure de diagnostic est essentielle. Nous pouvons à titre d’exemple faire le parallèle avec un rendez-vous chez le médecin ; ce dernier ne peut vous prescrire une ordonnance sans au préalable vous avoir ausculté et interrogé sur les différents symptômes que vous ressentez physiquement. A défaut, au lieu de guérir vous allez aggraver vos maux. Cette attitude vigilante du médecin traitant doit se retrouver lorsque nous envisageons le recours à une « roqya ». Pour illustrer ce propos, nous citerons l’exemple de l’anthropologue, spécialiste de l’islam européen, Farid El Asri, chercheur associé au Centre Jacques Berque, qui nous rapporte une situation alarmante suite à une « roqya » : « Une jeune femme en Belgique (…) est morte suite à une tentative d’exorcisme. Pendant les séances, les fkihs (imams) utilisent normalement de l’eau « coranisée ». Pour cette jeune femme, prétendument stérile, les exorcistes ont carrément plongé son visage dans l’eau et quand elle tentait d’en sortir pour respirer, les guérisseurs estimaient qu’il s’agissait du jinn qui l’habitait et ils replongeaient son visage dans l’eau. Pendant le procès, la famille de la défunte s’est présentée comme musulmane et a accusé ces pratiques d’être extérieures à l’islam quand les guérisseurs estimaient qu’ils avaient simplement fait ce qu’ils pouvaient. Le fait de recourir trop systématiquement au fkih risque également de faire passer une crise d’épilepsie, par exemple, pour une crise de possession. »[3] Nous allons aborder enfin la dernière problématique, celle relative aux honoraires du soignant. III- Les honoraires du soignant Le Prophète, bénédictions et salut sur lui, « a agréé les Compagnons qui ont été payés pour la roqya ». Il est dès lors autorisé de rémunérer un soignant en contrepartie d’une prestation. Toutefois, cette rémunération doit être raisonnable et surtout clairement définie avant le traitement. En outre, nous ne pouvons que souligner et rappeler que, si la roqya est réalisée dans un cadre sérieux, il convient de procéder à toutes les déclarations administratives. Comme pour tout contrat, vous devez exiger un document écrit et le praticien doit préciser quels sont ses engagements exacts afin d’éviter tout litige postérieur. Malheureusement, tous les témoignages transmis à l’UFCM soulignent que l’interlocuteur insiste à plusieurs reprises sur la gratuité de la prestation. Or, dans les faits, cette dernière est payante puisque le coût de la communication est surtaxé. Ainsi, l’une des victimes qui nous a contacté, s’est retrouvée avec une facture téléphonique (hors forfait) de 1800 euros. Par conséquent, nous constatons que ces « roqyas » gratuites sont fondées sur la technique dite du « call-back » qui consiste à amener une personne à rappeler un numéro surtaxé, information qui lui est bien évidemment dissimulée. Une « roqya » peut être payante à condition de respecter un cadre prédéterminé, fondé sur l’information et la transparence des honoraires. En conclusion A la lumière des développements susvisés, l’UFCM appelle d’une part à une régulation du métier de la pratique de la « roqya », d’autre part, à la vigilance de chacun à ne pas céder à la tentation d’une « roqya » qui ne serait pas réalisée dans les conditions requises et qui pourrait produire des effets inverses. Au-delà du cadre spirituel ou juridique, les divers témoignages reçus et étudiés par l’UFCM ne peuvent pas nous laisser indifférents à la question suivante : pourquoi des personnes sont-elles amenées à accepter aussi facilement une « roqya » par téléphone ? Est-ce la gratuité qui a déterminé leur choix ? Certes le mal-être produit par cette société est de plus en plus grand. Nous vivons une époque où les êtres sont de plus en plus coupés des signes de Dieu et vivent un rythme de vie effréné. Ces affaires sont révélatrices des maux les plus profonds qui touchent la communauté musulmane. Par ailleurs, comme l’ensemble des rites islamiques (hajj, halal, pompes funèbres) censés nous rappeler les limites qui déterminent la voie vers Dieu, nous constatons que leur marchandisation trahit de plus en plus leur vocation première. Suffit-il qu’un interlocuteur se présente à nous comme un « cheikh » ou un imam et qu’il nous propose une « roqya » gratuite pour l’accepter aussitôt Ne devrions-nous pas tous nous interroger sur le fait qu’il y ait des musulmanes et des musulmans aussi isolés et aussi ignorants de leur propre religion pour être trompés aussi facilement ? Sommes-nous devenus si dépendants des Hommes que nous en oublions de nous adresser directement à Dieu pour solutionner nos malaises ? Autant de questions que chacun d’entre nous a la responsabilité de se poser. En effet, aucun de nous ou de nos proches ne sont à l’abri d’une telle tromperie. Il convient enfin de rappeler que la « roqya » est un remède précis et qu’elle ne peut se faire que sous certaines conditions et surtout qu’elle demeure l’exception à la règle, qui est de toujours s’adresser directement à Dieu. Avant de recourir à une « roqya », il convient de faire une introspection sur ses propres pratiques cultuelles et de revenir.

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  212. Ja myślałam, że w pierwszym trymestrze będę musiała zwolnić się z pracy mimo że ją uwielbiam, no poprostu mdłości, wymioty inapady snu nie dawaly mi normalnie funkcjonować, mimo wszelkich moich prób radzenia sobie z tym, ale przyszedł drugi trymestr i rewelacja, wszystko przeszło, za to dorwałymnie zaparcia…a niestety żadne domowe naturalne sposoby nie działaja, nie wiem jak sobie pomóc już, dodam, że naprawdę zdrowo się odzywiam, nie jem za dwoje i mam sporo ruchu…może znasz jakieś sposoby?

    • Wiesz co, chyba tylko wlewać w siebie jak najwięcej wody, choć jak widać z tekstu to też nie dawałam sobie za bardzo z tym rady. Ja jak już nie mogłam patrzeć na wodę, to robiłam sobie letnią wodę z cytryną i piłam przez rurkę, jakoś lepiej mi wchodziło. Pocieszę Cię, że w momencie, kiedy urodzisz, nagle te wszystkie dolegliwości znikną jak za dotknięciem czarodziejskiej różdżki. Pamiętam jak wieczorem w dzień narodzin Dawida leżałam na szpitalnym łóżku i nagle sobie zdałam sprawę, że pierwszy raz od nie pamiętam kiedy nie mam zgagi i zaparcia, minął zespół niespokojnych nóg i ból bioder. Cierpliwości, dużo wody i będzie dobrze 🙂

  213. U mnie wydawało się być rewelacyjnie. Owszem- trądzik na plecach, który posiadam obecnie nie był tak obfity nawet w trakcie dojrzewania. Myślałam, że wszystko jest do przeżycia. Od początku walczę z wciąż rosnącymi wynikami tarczycy i spadajacą hemoglobiną. A od wczoraj cukrzyca. Pociesza mnie fakt, że zostały 2 miesiące. Podobno w 3 trymestrze juz nic więcej się do mnie nie przyklei:) ale wiem jedno- jak zobaczę swojego małego meżczyznę o wszystkim zapomnę na zawsze 😉 Pozdrawiam 🙂

  214. Ja bym jeszcze dodała masakrycznie przetłuszczające się włosy i skórę, takie wypryski jak mam teraz (a jest to dopiero 10 tydzień) nie pamiętam od czasów liceum. Czuje się jakbym miała ospę, trądzik na twarzy, szyi, ramionach, dekoldzie i plecach….
    Jestem na początku „drogi” ale wiele dolegliwości już zaliczyłam – jest ze mną zgaga od samego początku zanim zrobiłam test, jest wiecznie pełny pęcherz, są bolesne i swędzące piersi ze mam ochotę je czasem wydrapać, nie zapominajmy o mdłościach – nie tylko rano ale o każdej porze dnia i nocy, skurcze łydek, senność ale jak przyjdzie co do czego nie za cholerę nie potrafię się wyspać, a i ta wszechobecna niemoc. Mam zwolnienie leżące, ciąża zagrożona (wcześniejszą poroniłam) i uwierzcie chętnie bym coś czasem zrobiła ale wielkim wyczynem jest dla mnie sama kąpiel po której mam zawroty głowy i zadyszkę jak nie wiem. Zazdroszczę tym Panią które przechodzą ten okres bezboleśnie. A najbardziej już wkurza mnie że takie kobiety, które muszą leżeć są nazywane leniuchami przez te które mogą być aktywne. Nie jestem leniem kanapowym, też bym chętnie wyskoczyła na spacer na świeże powietrze ale nie mogę. A jak czytam że teraz to popularne jest ćwiczenie z Chodakowską w ciąży to szlag mnie trafia. kto może niech ćwiczy ale niech nie ocenia innych kobiet, które często nie chcą a muszą leżeć plackiem i modlić się o szczęśliwe rozwiązanie. Pozdrawiam i życzę dużo zdrowia.

    • Biedna 🙁 współczuję i mam nadzieję, że większość tych dolegliwości zniknie niedługo i będziesz cieszyć się ciążą w lepszym samopoczuciu. Też uważam, że jeżeli ktoś może, to niech ćwiczy i robi co chce, ale niech nie ocenia kogoś, kto nie może, bo to naprawdę bywa drażniące. Teraz jest moda na ciążę fit i modny jest pogląd, że dolegliwości ciążowe to wymysł ciężarnych. Tylko księżna Kate się nad nami zlitowała i pokazała, że wielkie sławy również mogą źle znosić ciążę i z powodu wymiotów lądowała parę razy w szpitalu. Też bym wolała śmigać na spacery i być aktywna, ale nie mogę, nic nie poradzę. Tobie również dużo zdrowia, i dla maleństwa oczywiście też 🙂

  215. Hej ,przypomnialas mi jak to ” cudownie” bylo byc w ciazy:) Szczegolnie kiedy mialam wrazenie,ze jej „koncowka” trwac bedzie jakies 3 lata:p Prawda jest jednak taka,ze masz szanse to pozniej zapomniec,ja 2.5 miesiaca po porodzie juz odczuwam lekka nostalgie:) Nie chce cie martwic,ale przygotuj sie na jeszcze jedna ewentualnosc- dziecko pod koniec ma tak malo miejsca;ze moze byc ciezko wyczuc ruchy. Wierz mi,to dopiero jest paranoja. Na szczescie wtedy zawsze mozesz podjechac do szpitala na ktg zrobic monitoring. Mam nadzieje,ze przezyjesz koncowke ciazy bezstresowo. 3mam kciuki :))

    • no właśnie też mi się wydaje, że będę wspominać mimo wszystkich nieprzyjemności…z przyjemnością 😉 to fajny czas, chociaż czasem ciąża daje popalić 🙂

  216. No to ja należe chyba do mniejszości i moja ciąża przebiega prawie bezobjawowo 🙂 Prawie bo tylko towarzyszy mi zatkany nos i co najmniej 1 pobudka w nocy na siku 🙂 Gdyby nie rosnący brzuszek i ruchy młodej to pewnie bym pomyślała że pewnie mi się przytyło od nadmiaru wody 😉

    • szczęściara 🙂 też mam koleżanki, które rewelacyjnie przechodzą ten czas, może w następnej ciąży, jeżeli mi się jeszcze kiedyś uda w niej być, też będę taką szczęściarą 🙂

  217. A jak nie masz nudności, zgagi, hemoroidów to masz inne objawy w pakiecie. Skóra twarzy dziczeje i podrażnia ją nawet woda. Płaczesz gdy mąż zrobi ci herbatę/oglądasz dzieci na reklamach/trzymasz w ręku niemowlęcy kocyk. Masz piękne włosy, za to wypadła ci większość rzęs. Najwygodniej nie jest na leżąco- w pozycji stojącej najmniej cię wszystko uciska i drętwieje. No a czasem ja bobas ruszy się za szybko to może się okazać, iż się posikałaś 😉 Kopniaki wynagradzają wszystko :)))

  218. Jezeli chodzi o włosy to rzeczywiscie w ciąży miałam super gęste lsniace itd. Niestety jest to stan przejsciowy i po 3 mies karmienia wypadają garsciami 🙁 jeżeli chodzi o depilacje to moje wloski zachamowaly swoj wzrost w ciąży, jakby ich nie bylo.
    Każda ciąża jest inna ale wszystko da sie przeżyć 🙂 a noworodek położony na Twoim brzuchu zaraz po porodzie … to jest niesamowite 🙂 juz niedługo sama sie przekonasz.
    Szczesliwego rozwiazania życzę -Kasia mama 3 🙂

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